{I hope you noted the deep sarcasm in those words}

What. A. Day.

Just another one of those long, exhausting, mentally draining, overwhelming days in the Mommyhood.

Sigh.

Nico has been TERRIBLE! He's has me all over the place emotionally. From sweet and loving, to outrageously pissed of, so f-ing mad I ....almost started crying of overwhelming f-r-u-s-t-r-a-t-i-o-n.

I blame it on this STUPID cold, wintery, wet weather. He probably feels like a jailed little man on house arrest. I don't blame him. I do too, but worse. I'm like a barely sane inmate confined to a mad house some days. This IS a mad house. I am this close to losing. My. Freakin. MIND! When the hell is Spring going to arrive? I was through with Winter the day it started back in December. When you have little ones (two under the age of 3 in my case) when winter comes you do nothing but hibernate.

Repeat: Hibernate.

That's right. Any planning you want to do gets squeezed into the Spring part of the calendar. And that feels like light years away!

Most Moms I know feel the same way. Unless there is pretty much absolutely n-o-t-h-i-n-g, and I mean NOTHING in the house to eat. Ok, ok, at least nothing you would want to eat, which in that case probably should be thrown out or donated, depending on its edible status which can be questionable sometimes. There are few plausible reasons to even think of leaving the house with two kids. Most reasons are simply not important enough to leave our warm cave. We're like bears. If you don't believe me ask my thighs, and belly... they're piling up some extra goody stuff that aren't going to sit well with my bathing suit {or the public} come summer. Ha!

{Note to self: Diet and exercise ASAP!}

Sigh.

Today alone, Nico has...

Among a very long list of things, had 3 potty accidents.

There was the one, first thing in the morning. How could I forget it? It was 6:53 am! He woke me up, half undressed with his arm trapped half way over his head, and all winy told me he was stuck and wet. It was pitch black. {What's he a freakin rooster? GO BACK TO SLEEP! I thought to myself...} After changing his diaper and clothes and a failed attempt to put him back in his bed, of course it was wet too, I brought him back to our bed in what turned out to be yet another failed attempt to catch more zzzs. It was not even 7 am yet. Sigh.

He never fell asleep again. Neither did I. His incessant squirming around, poking my back with his feet and knees, and little voice {as cute as it is, I don't care for it at the crack of dawn} repeatedly sounding like a broken record saying, "I can't sleep Mommy, I can't" was as torturous as knowing the hour # was still on 6 when my beautiful precious sleep came to an end.

I could have cried. But I was too busy trying desperately to fall back asleep.

Then there were the two others. Intentional ones, I say. Potty accidents. Remember we're still really talking about that. The fact he decided not to tell me he had peed and pooped in the potty at some point led me to not wiping him... which led to noticing after it was way too late that he left me a big gift in the potty, and a soiled underwear on the floor (and later a repeat story but that time it was a pull up), all while he ran around naked. I was only too late each time I realized he was sitting all over our family room leather sofas with it all hanging out, spreading the poop love all over. It was a poop fest!

At least the leather sofas were easier to clean than if they would have been cloth. 

I should mention a tiny detail, which really adds to the seriousness of these events. Nico's stools have been very runny and deadly stinky (smelling like worst than something dead) the past couple weeks. Yeah, that made the entire ordeal just that much more fun.

Besides all the poop... Nico also spent the entire day throwing stuff at me, hitting me, and screaming at me. Also defying me. Talking back. You name it, he done it.

Then there was little Victoria. You'd think she's just so darn cute nothing bad could ever come from her... Then came the moment she woke up from her nap with the biggest, runniest, STINKIEST poop EVER! It was greenish. And it was SO disgusting I gagged and literally almost threw up. Her's too smelled like something far beyond dead.

What have my kids been ingesting???!!

I don't understand how something so horrendous could come from something so adorably cute. I guess it is what it is. Sh*t happens.

Yes, there’s more. Victoria wouldn't stop squirming around while I tried changing her diaper, so of course she got poop all over my hands, arms, pants, and all of herself as well.  I swear she needs to be restrained and heavily sedated to accomplish a simple task like changing her diaper. This would have been a wonderful time to do just so. ARGHH!

The carpet and floor got poop on it as well. {No, I didn't use a changing table or changing pad.} Squirmy little monster princess. Dear God!

I guess I should be thankful she took a nice long nap at least.

But then she threw up on me after I took her clothes off. A thank you, perhaps? Uhg. Good thing it was all over my dirty pooped pants.

I thoroughly washed myself, and her, and changed both of us. My scrubbing was beyond what doctors do before entering the OR. That's how disgusting the whole thing was. And we STILL reek of poop! I bet Julio will love that when he gets home. His girls' lovely smell... of... eu de merde. {Welcome to the Mommyhood!}

Oh.

Another forgotten thought just came back to me. Because this day only kept getting better and better. {Note the sarcasm, please.}

The toilet got clogged when I tried flushing down one of Nico's nasty stools. Just fabulous! Luckily it didn't over-flood. But, I am not attempting to deal with that disgusting mess. That'll be another little surprise to welcome Julio home from work. ENOUGH POOP, I'M SO THROUGH WITH IT ALL!!!!! ARGHHHHHH!!! 

Nico has also spent the entire day hitting Victoria. You name it he's done it to her. Poor princess. I've caught him in the act so many times, I've ran out of measures of punishment. I'm unsure if it's due to jealousy, or maybe he's got too much energy built up due to winter hibernation and isn't able to burn it off in a safe and productive way.

.

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...Ah!!...

...my savior arrived!! Julio, brought home cheese slices for sandwiches. That may after all be what's for dinner tonight.

He also kissed me hello. Makes my world a better place instantly. :)

He unclogged the toiled immediately. Poop be gone... the toilet Master is home! LOL

He also took care of feeding and putting Victoria to sleep.

And played with Nico.

And gave me some much needed time to hear my own thoughts and write this out.

My ears are sore from all the crying that happened in this house today. That includes all of my mental cries.  I also have a terrible headache.

I managed to not go completely insane, again. I don't know how though. Another notch on my belt.  

And as the cherry on top...

The house is an entire mess. Again. Thanks to Hurricane Nico! :/

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Ok… Off to have me a drink! Red Wine... here I come! 

Cheers to this paradise called Mommyhood, and to us brave women who find the strength, the will and the mind to get up everyday to do it. All. Over. Again.

Salud!