Our dishwasher has decided all on its own it needs to be replaced. Julio begs to differ ‘jokingly’ stating I probably did something to it and I’m now rejoicing at the prospect of finally replacing the darn thing. Ok, I’ll be honest the darn thing is white, ugly, old, rusted, noisy and yes I’ve always wished for something newer, nicer, and stainless steel.  But honestly, I’m unsure whether I should celebrate [yay! finally get to replace that old piece of junk white d.w. with a new stainless steel one…] or I should cry [crap, this stupid d.w. finally has taken revenge on my dirty talk about it’s bad looks and pain-in the butt configuration, blah blah blah… darn it, looks like we’ll have to fork out $700 or so for the stainless steel one, just fabulous :S ].

 

The stupid thing has a nasty smell that prevails well through wash cycles; of course it must be coming from the puddled water that’s permanently logged in the bottom of the tub, quite disgusting!! Do I even have to mention the bits of food that are floating in that water?? So the dishes only look clean after they are washed, but they’re being washed with dirty water, and the last rinse is filled with old food goodies-- omg, I think I could puke!!

 

So… we’ve tried several things in what’s only been futile attempts to fix the darn thing. We (well, Julio really, I wouldn’t touch that thing) even hand emptied the sitting water, disassembled the inner goods where water is supposed to be drained through, cleaned it out, and put it back together. Turned on the lowest cycle, and again got a puddle of water sitting nicely in the bottom. Fabulous. :S There’s not much else we can do, and I’m not calling a plumber to pay him and arm and a leg to tell me we need to fix [whatever is wrong, read: $$ for repairing a 2002 d.w.] or we need a new one because this one finally gave in. I guess I’m deciding to give the d.w. a death with dignity… or am I? I’ll be putting it (and quite frankly myself) out of it’s misery soon and replacing it with a newer, better, sleeker stainless steel model. I’m not going to tell that to the d.w. though, I couldn’t be that cruel. ;)

 

So, should I celebrate or cry?? Moral of this story: Goodbyes are never easy… and somehow we always get screwed one way or another. Ca-ching!

Just thought I'd mention that Julio discovered yesterday that there are some visual issues with my blog when using an Internet Explorer (I.E.) browser. I use Google Chrome or Mozilla Firefox and notice no issues whatsoever, so it came as a surprise when he mentioned it.

With I.E. the left straight edge of the blogging space (tan colored) overlaps about half an inch into the area where entries are posted (white notepad area) cutting into the entry titles, blog entries, etc. as seen in the following pic:



Sometimes the overlap disappears (as I noticed when I expanded the browser to it's maximum, taking up the entire screen of the computer) and goes back to where it's supposed to be, but other times it doesn't. Sometimes if you move the cursor around the blog (specifically on the blog entries area) this overlap happens and sometimes readjusts to its normal position again. It's only a visual problem, and does not affect the written content in any other way, other than being simply annoying (and perhaps somewhat distracting). The following pic shows the normal blog template and how its supposed to look:


I don't know if there is a solution to this issue, and if so what that is. In any case, I thought I'd let you know in case you've been thinking I must be crazy for choosing a distorted looking blog template while viewing it through an I.E. browser. If you've been seeing it the wrong way you can try accessing my blog from a different browser such as the ones I use (Chrome or Firefox).  Let me know if you had/have any issues viewing my blog. Thanks!

Mommyhood As Reduction Sauce (*How to boil a girl down to her essence*) »

I met a neighbor who was there with 3 of her kids. She was very nice and upbeat. We’d waked past her house on our way to the park just minutes earlier, and even back then she’d said hello and commented about the gorgeous day. We started talking about the kids, the neighborhood and activities, where we were from, when we moved here, etc. I mentioned I was joining the local MOMS Club at the next meeting, and coincidently she said she was a member and loved it. We had a wonderful chat, and after a good hour at the park we came back home. I came back with renewed energy and a sense of ‘wholeness’. After Nico went down for his nap I enthusiastically got several things done on my To Do list, I even enjoyed them. Warm sunny days are just filled with endless possibilities and opportunities. Everyday should be warm and sunny!

As I listen to the glorious sounds of birds chirping and singing outside I realize spring has finally arrived. I hope I’m not jinxing it, God knows how much I’ve been longing for the new season and how through I was with winter the day it started. I love being at home, but winter seemed to be endless and I’ve felt like a bear in hibernation. Who wants to go through the hassle of putting on and taking off all the winter gear, not only for yourself, but even more painfully for your 21+ mth toddler in the middle of winter, nevertheless having to battle the ruthless cold, snow, wind, even rain? Certainly no me. Oh, and did I mention I was in my second and third trimester of pregnancy? Thank God Spring has finally arrived! (A bit early it seems, and I’m hoping it’s for good. No more cold and snow please!) It seems like forever ago that I heard the birds and their joyful sounds which are so uplifting to the spirit. Oh how I’ve missed them! I can’t wait for the trees and shrubs to start flowering and the greens to start sprouting, announcing in full colors spring has arrived!...and of course, also announcing Victoria's soon arrival! How exciting! :)

Just a few days ago I learned my (much older) step-brother’s grandson, Brendan, was just diagnosed with a rare form of cancer called angiosarcoma. If that’s not devastating enough, let me tell you this little guy is only 6 years old. His mother is only a year older than I am, and as a mother myself (and someone who knows firsthand the hell it is to experience and fight a direct family member’s cancer) I can only imagine the horror she’s living. From what I’ve understood, it was pure luck that they caught it at its early stage. The doctors found some tumor(s) in his foot while evaluating him for some complications he had in the healing of a broken bone (toe or such) that happened months ago. I’m not sure of the details, his specific prognostics, or the treatments he’ll be getting. All I know is that the road that lies ahead is not going to be an easy one for Brendan or his family. Ever since I got the news I cannot stop thinking about him and how the odds played such a strange roll in his case. I’m so humbled, and so grateful for my family’s good health; I thank God every day. I pray for Brendan and his family daily, and I keep reminding myself to not ever take my blessings for granted.

Brendan’s story reminded me that I should continue to spread the word on cancer awareness and screenings. Not that I haven’t been doing so over the course of the last two thirds of my life. Telling my personal family cancer stories over and over again over the years has been a means of spreading the word on awareness. It can happen to anyone, anytime. When the disease is such a global epidemic I don’t think anyone should think that these stories are too personal to tell. There is definitely no shame in any aspect of it in any way. It’s only made us all stronger.

Dad’s suffered from skin cancer for years, but it was never an ‘issue’. He’s fair skinned, and of course living in Venezuela he’s been exposed to a lot of sun. Not using sunscreen didn’t help either. Anyway, his little cancer blotches have been cauterized when needed, and they’ve been random here and there. No therapies (chemo, radiation, etc.) of any kind were ever needed. But it’s a reality. Dad’s had skin cancer multiple times.

The real surprise came in 2006, when he noticed that what had been a tiny spec of nothing on his left nipple had become a few short months later a lump (the size of a huge grape, as we found later). I was actually with him at the Dr’s office when he had it removed, and after it was sent in for a biopsy we were shocked to find it was malignant. Dad had breast cancer. And that was the tumor which had been entirely removed. We were dumbfounded, shocked and really confused. Doesn’t breast cancer affect well, women? It turns out it is very rare in men, but it can happen, and it did. Long story short, Dad traveled to the US for one operation to check if the cancer had spread to the lymph nodes (it didn’t, so great!) and had a mastectomy of his left breast. He didn’t need any further treatment and has been fine ever since. I can happily report he’s also loving and living life, healthy and enjoying being a Grandpa.

My personal stories with fighting family cancer started at the very young age of 9. My mother was 39 yrs old when she was diagnosed (by the stroke of luck) with stage III Ovarian cancer. The doctors’ prognosis were anything but hopeful. The strange thing was a few weeks before the diagnosis she’d undergone an extensive health checkup elsewhere and was told she was fine. But how could they ever miss such an enormous tumor in her belly? We’re still dumbfounded. Anyway… My parents told me straight up Mom had cancer, and for my entire 4^th grade year she lived in Florida (at a cousin’s home, with Grandma as her caretaker) where she had operations and treatments, including several chemo rounds. I recollect little about that entire year oddly, only that I missed Mom and was looking forward to her returning back home with us, as if that were a fact. Luckily she did return home with us, cancer free, and life went on. It was only when I was much older that I learned the doctors had told her she’d most likely not make it, and also of her fears of not being able to watch me grow and be with me at all of my milestone life events. That’s how bad her cancer was. But she defied the odds. One true hero.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the end of it. Three years later she got cancer again, only this time it was in the short intestine. Apparently it stemmed from the original ovarian cancer, so some cancer cells had spread there somehow. She underwent more operations and chemo treatments, only this time I was older and had a much better understanding of the reality, and she didn’t move to Florida for a year. She traveled back and forth to the US for operations and chemo treatments. It was a real reality check to personally face the face of cancer. I saw her lose all her hair, and all the other effects of chemo. It was not easy to see her suffering, and it really was an eye opener. Luckily once again, after the entire ordeal she walked away from an ill fate, victorious. Cancer free.

What are the odds, right? Well… come to think of it… 3 yrs after her second cancer scare she had it again, only this time it was in the colon. Things went about the same way they did when she had it in the intestine. Back and forth travel for operations and treatments, watching the effects of chemo, and all of us fighting strong, together. I am so proud and happy to say, for the third time the cancer did not claim her. She was cancer free. She claimed victory, and so did we.


It’s been almost 20 yrs since her first cancer, and 13 yrs since her third and last cancer scare. I’m happy to report she’s alive and well, loving and living life, and enjoying being a Grandma. She’s been able to be at my 15^th and 18^th birthdays, high school graduation, college graduation, wedding, witnessed the birth of Nico, and will now be coming for Victoria’s birth. Life is wonderful.

Cancer is a global epidemic. It is a reality. Anybody can get it. Anybody can be affected, directly or indirectly.
I bet everyone probably knows at least one person who’s had some form of cancer. At the very least everyone knows someone who knows someone else who’s been affected by cancer. You hear stories everywhere daily, in the news, magazines, tv, even among people you encounter in the street. From the most common and talked about lung and breast cancer, to those whose names are just as rare as the type of cancer itself. Cancer affects people of all ages, all races and all cultures. What you never expect is to be personally affected by the dreadful disease; you never imagine yourself or anyone you love getting it. I guess that’s just everyone’s hopeful optimism, or naïve denial. You hear about how it happens to others, and though in reality it can happen to anyone, chances are you think “it can’t happen to me”. The truth is this disease is reaching many, by the day, and we all need to open our eyes and ears and accept it is a very harsh reality and it can happen to anybody, anywhere, anytime. We need to spread awareness and encourage everyone to get appropriate screenings to ensure its early detection. This disease affects not only the person who gets it, but also their families and friends in a way only someone who’s lived through it could ever describe.

Cancer has run in my family for years and has affected all of us immensely. I feel it’s my duty to be a part of spreading awareness and encouraging all to get screened. Please don’t delay. Do it for yourself. Do it for your family and all those who love you. Additionally, I’ve included some cancer awareness badges on my blog to support the ongoing efforts to spread the word.

I will share some personal family cancer stories in a later post. In the mean time… please, I ask you all to do whatever you can to try to stop this disease from spreading, and take the time to encourage yourself and those you love to get screened. You can show your support in many ways, the simplest are spreading the word and displaying the cancer awareness ribbons, which come in an array of colors each pertaining to a specific kind of cancer.  If you’d like any of the awareness badges I’ve placed here in my blog simply click on them and you should be redirected to the hosting website. Again, thanks for your support!

As if hormones didn’t do enough to your body during your 9 mths as an incubator, they also have a very bizarre effect on your dreams. No, you’re not safe from the hormonal effects while you sleep either, so don’t get your hopes up for shut eye normalcy, lol. A lot of my dreams have been action-packed (which have left me feeling exhausted and un-rested when I wake up), others very stressful (and I wake up sweating and worried). I wouldn’t classify these as dreams or night mares, perhaps they should be simply called bizarre mind phenomena.

Here’s a list of small recollections (bits and pieces) of the strangest dreams I’ve had with this pregnancy. Please, don’t judge and don’t ask… lol:

* I was at a fancy hotel for some convention sharing a room with the First Family, The Obamas. I had my own queen bed all for myself, and they had their own. Yes, all four of them shared one queen bed. And their black dog was with them too.
* This (stupid) girl I haven’t seen since I was like 17 slapped me because according to her I was onto her man, which wasn’t true. Anyway, I never liked the girl in the first place, and in the dream I remembered that fact so I beat the crap out of her. And I mean BEAT. It was almost like watching one of those martial arts movies, lol, and I was the strong one, and of course I won. I even grabbed her by the hair and flipped her over like a pancake. So empowering, so awesome! I have to admit a got much pleasure and satisfaction out of that dream. ;) {giggles}
* I was swimming very deep down in the ocean and entered a dark cave filled with white octopuses, and one very large black one. They were all immobile, as if sleeping. I got out and a man told me how lucky I was to be alive because the white octopuses were the deadliest, and just a touch from their tentacles could have killed me.
* Julio and I were taking a small ferry in the middle of the ocean towards some newly discovered islands which had ancient ruins older than the Roman and Greek empires. The ferry sunk about 3 feet into the water, but we were not to worry according to the guide because it was normal. Of course seeing the giant crocodile/dinosaur-like creatures swimming around us made it all a bit more terrifying.
* I was on board a large cruise ship to who knows where with some of my old high school classmates. I was having trouble finding a table where to sit in the restaurant, and then a moment later everyone disappeared, all but 2 gals. I don’t know what happened to the boat, but all of a sudden the 3 of us were stuck in a tiny red light aircraft that was made of plastic, had no seatbelts, and was missing the steering equipment. We were nose diving at a million mi/hr getting ready to crash, I was calm (??) and told them “say your prayers, I don’t think we’re gonna make it” and yet I was able to successfully land us on the ocean, without a scratch. No, we didn’t crash, and what a coincidence there was an island about 200 ft away we could swim to.
* Julio and I had moved into a large empty warehouse. It was grey and dirty, and the kitchen was missing all the appliances, except the Microwave, which seemed like something out of the future. The whole place used to belong to my friend Maria and her family. (??) I kept asking where the range was, and why the two ovens were missing. And why was it all black and dirty, as if it were straight out of a coal mine?
* I was at a movie theater, and apparently a lot of people had gone missing (idk for what reason). There was a booth handing out belongings of missing people they’d found. As I got some bibs and shirts they’d found that belonged to Nico (yes he’d gone missing), I noticed a bin full of shoes and socks that belonged to my friend Maria’s daughter. I asked about them and they said I could have them. I started balling, I was so sad but then I bumped into Maria on my way out and asked her how she could be so calm after losing her daughter, and to my shock she simply told me “life goes on”. I cried my eyes out.
* I was in a hospital and they wanted a urine sample. They gave me a set of cups, and the first one I took was very dirty, as if it had already been used for something else, so I used another one. Not much else to report on this dream.
* I was walking in a mall while about 8 mths pregnant and accidentally bumped into a woman and her friend. I said sorry and I kept walking, but they came after me and pushed me. One of them started hitting me, and before I knew it we were physically fighting. She kept hitting me really hard right in the middle of the belly, where she knew it would hurt the most. And I kept telling her she couldn’t do that because it was not fair. (??) Then I started screaming for help. No one came to help me, and I don’t know who won the fight in the end.

If you have any strange dreams you remember from when you were pregnant, share them with me. I’d love to get a glimpse of the crazy mind phenomena you experienced.